Racconto pulp di Lorenzo (Corrado Guzzanti)

Uno dei più alti testi letterari degli ultimi anni, e un must per gli addetti ai lavori del settore.

Quella notte Frenz fu il cantante dei Flora Batterika e secernette al bar.

A un certo punto se vede uno che fa un assolo col basso che lui ci aveva lo sgarratore da cucina colla punta; se féve un movimento nei confronti della vecchia che ignara stava seduta ignara vicino a lui e quell’altro vicino alla vecchia.

Lei le rivolse a lui uno sguardo emifluo sapaneo vagamente lazziale…

Fu un tuttuno d’azione un attimo dopo, a tutt’oggi. la vecchia non c’era più salvo fatto la pozza di sangue vecchio coi globuli bianchi di capello che saltavano sul bancone del bar.

“Aaaaaaahhhhhh!”, gridò la vecchia! Ma era già morta prima!

Veniamo a sapere così che il barista era il figlio perchè si presse le mani contro le tempie… Aaaahhh, perchè lo hai fatto? Le mani bariste si udì di scricchiolamento e il  cranio cedette sulle fasce laterali il cervello volo via dalla bocca come un canarino dalla gabbia che una volta io e il Carota lo avevamo liberato da piccoli che ci faceva pena poveraccio che tanto lo avevamo già ammazzato a fiondate…

A un certo punto se vede uno grosso che raccoglie il cervello e lo piazza nella macchina del caffè poi mette tazzina, tira giù la leva… Fammelo forte – disse Frenz – chè domani c’è il derby!”

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